Notes from “How to Know a Person” by David Brooks

This is a book that was suggested by a friend, and he has his entire family reading it. It’s about how to know other people, but much of it is focused on how to know yourself. It’s an excellent read.

Check out my video overview of the book here, or read on to see some of my notes.

Part 1: I See You

1. The Power of Being Seen

“Junior year I wanted to date a woman named Bernice. But after doing some intel gathering, I discovered she wanted to go out with another guy. I was shocked. I remember telling myself, “What is she thinking? I write way better than that guy!” It’s quite possible that I had a somewhat constrained view of how social life worked for most people.”

“When I was young, I wanted to be knowledgeable, but as I got older, I wanted to be wise. Wise people don’t just possess information; they possess a compassionate understanding of other people. They know about life.”

“There is one skill that lies at the heart of any healthy person, family, school, community organization, or society: the ability to see someone else deeply and make them feel seen — to accurately know another person, to let them feel…